Private Foyle’s Battlefield 3 Multiplayer Impressions…..continued!

Welcome back to Private Foyle’s Battlefield 3 Impressions (If you missed the first batch you can catch up here).  Since yesterday’s initial deployment to the battlefield Private Foyle has been issued with the latest war correspondent technology: A screenshot capture button.  So we no longer need to rely on his frankly terrible literary powers of description to paint a picture of his online capers, he can use the power of his terrible photography instead.  You have been warned:

Kharg Island - Not as Piratey as the name suggests

KHARG ISLAND – CONQUEST LARGE

Oh, yes.  Now this is more like it.  No more tight tunnels.  No more sheltered courtyards and running infantry battles.  Here is a proper Battlefield map.

We find ourselves fighting over flags dotted around a desert peninsula.  The land is open and barren, with fragile warehouses and occasional stone buildings breaking up the crisscrossing sand and tarmac roads.  Warships wait menacingly just off shore.  And is that an Aircraft Carrier I spy?  This is clearly a vehicle led map.

Flag successfully defended

Again I’ve joined mid-game so I deploy my trusty Assault class onto an already captured flag.  After impatiently waiting about 30 seconds to defend against attackers that don’t show, I give up and go looking for a vehicle.

Jeep! Jeep!

Here’s one!  It’s not a tank but it’ll do.  Onwards to battle!  Which way to the frontline!?

Who leaves anti-tank mines THERE!?

OWWW!  What are the odds!  If you can’t quite place that picture it is approximately where the one before was taken from.  I got 2 metres before driving over an anti-tank mine.  Balls.

Luckily one of my erstwhile squadmates (whom I’ve not even seen yet on this vast map) has commandeered a tank that needs a gunner.  It’s so handy just spawning into vehicles like this!

The view from a tank's mounted gun.  The green tint matches the nauseous feeling you get being driven around

Here we’ve just blown up an enemy tank!  I say we, I mean the driver who controls the main gun, but don’t worry I did manage to shoot a few guys before we met a fiery death after something (possibly one of the planes overhead?) missile locked us and blew us up.  I now realise the bleeping warning signals mean somebody has missile locked you.  You live and learn!  Or….well, you die and learn and then respawn.  Into….. an attack helicopter!

SQQQQQUUUUUUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!  WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHEEEEEYYYY!

Wooooah.  I've still not got used to the chopper controls

Blank screen:  YOUR TEAM LOST!  Buggar.  I didn’t even reach the mainland.  Must get in an attack chopper again soon.  And back on this map, it’s awesome.

No time to rest, though, onto the next map:

OPERATION METRO – CONQUEST

I was going to quit this one having played it to death in the Beta, but then I remembered that was only the Rush version, and a Conquest game played out on the Paris park at the start of the Rush map would be awesome.

Battlefield 3 running on my PC. (There's a sprinting joke in there somewhere)

Oh, right.  The Conquest game plays out in the bloody tunnels.  Bah.  Well, I’ve started so I might as well finish.  We capture 2 flags and then meet a complete bottleneck on the escalators down to the train tracks.  Handily there’s only 3 flags so we are technically winning.  As long as we can hold the escalators this should be easy.

Blurry screen = you are being suppressed, get out the way of the bullets

As well as accruing a ridiculous amount of healing points for plonking down medkits at the top of them (check out the screenshot above: 415 points from healing alone!) I spend most of the game lurking at the top of the escalators like in the picture above and (when I’m not being ‘suppressed’) pop over to shoot peoples.

Only paramedics can spell defibrillator without looking it up

The rest of my time spent resuscitating the piles of bodies that form at the top of the escalator and before you know it…

Hooray!

Hooray, I guess.

Incredibly boring map, though.  Remind me to never play Operation Metro again in any form.

Back to Kharg Island for me I think.  More impressions to follow, I expect.

[A note on the screenshots and system requirements – I won’t bore you with the details but my PC isn’t the newest and most powerful beast, so is running the game on ‘Custom’ graphics settings set a tiny bit below ‘medium’.  Apparently ‘low’ is the equivilent of the XBOX 360 version, so it should be better than screenshots of that, but it’s not going to match up to others you might have seen.  If you’re worrying you’ve just spent £1000 on a new rig and that’s all it’s going to look like, don’t worry, yours will look a lot better!  But for those wondering if their old faithful can play the game mine is a Dual-Core AMD 3Ghz; 2Gb RAM; GTS 250.  Ok, I lied, I did bore you with the details, but if you read til the end you probably wanted to know!]

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